Specimen A: Mad Libs
Edward
Edward is a purple scrotally vampire who likes to cook blood. He impregnated in the small town of Forks, Washington, under a constant cover of scrotums.
Edward's world comes crashing down around him when he meets Michael, a beardy teenager whose blood smells delicious. Also, he is unable to read Michael's cupcakes.
Specimen B: Birthday Wishes Part 1: The Anti-Present
We know that Bella likes her presents home made.
This was home made...
Birthday Wishes Part 2: Its Rhetorical
Can you think of anything else that might be home made?
Edward chuckles nervously as Bella's birthday present shows up a little early.
Specimen C: That's What She Said -- A Birthday Quote
"Edward wasn't the only member of his family with unusual skills"
Lurking Skills
Brooding Skills
Sparkling Skills
Kissing Skills
Bouffant Skills
Piano Skills
And other, mysterious skills that we know little about...
Yeah Edward, I think Bella was hoping for a little more than a cd on her Birthday.
Specimen D: A Birthday Drink
Paper Cuts -- How many shots before they bite?
1/2 oz grenadine
1 oz Tequila
salt (for the wound)
slice of lime
1. Prepare shot
2. pour salt on wound
3. Do shot
4. lick salt, suck on lime
5. Fight off hungry vampires... or not!
Specimen E:
I hope you've found something delicious to sink your teeth into! Happy Birthday!
Best bday present of my life. I can't decide which specimen is my favorite.
ReplyDeleteIn the car picture, I like the strategically placed car side-mirror. What is Edward hiding?
ReplyDelete