Edvent Calendar - Day 20

Eclipse: when a celestial object is temporarily obscured, either by passing into the shadow of another body or by having another body pass between it and the viewer.

Will you be waking up in the wee hours of the morning to see an Eclipse?

Edvent Calendar - Day Nine

Who would you rather catch beneath the mistletoe?

Edvent Calendar - Day Eight

Oh the weather outside is frightful, but the tent is so delightful...

A Picture Speaks 1000 Words

I'm pretty sure Stephenie Meyer was looking at the wrong picture when she wrote Breaking Dawn.

Better or Worse Than Jasper's: Part 5

Better than Jasper's?

This may even be better than Edward's.

Oh, Edward indeed!

The OTHER Emilee Reaches an Important Milestone

"I forgot to tell you that I finished Eclipse last night. I'm no longer feeling the pull to Team Jacob. Edward won me back. I'd kick both of 'em off a cliff for Team Mr. Darcy."

Oh, Edward. Don't cry! Everyone loves you best!

Product Placement / Middle Age

Oh, Edward. Sometimes you're a supermassive asshole.


Is that a family vehicle? A yuppie douchebag excuse for a minivan? Does it match your khaki? Does it match your outdated notions of sexuality? Heaven forbid you are overcompensating for something with a conspicuously expensive, high performance, vehicle.

While we adore watching you arrive at school in slooooooow moooooooooootion (really. we do. that's how you look when we dream about you, only you have a british accent and sometimes a top hat) maybe you should consider a more youthful vehicle.

While you're at it, just wear the (that's my) t-shirt. No need for that outer shirt that obscures your cute little pasty white jacob-wannabe-biceps.

Love,
Team Deer

Team Edward

Yeah.

Who Loves Edward the Most?

We do!

What we had that that dumb girl ahead of us didn't have:

• Solidarity! Where were her friends?
• Ukelele skillz.
• Burritos.
• Peanut butter and Jacob chocolates.
• Singing, in rounds.
• We also had a certain je ne sais sparkle.
• Forbidden Fruits conversation hearts.
• A top secret and painstakingly organized seating strategy, using a failsafe multi-team approach. Don't be afraid to use your elbows!
  

New Moon Countdown: Commence Swooning

Mr. Pattinson works himself up for his big premiere:

"I'm the belle. I'm the belle of the ball. Today's my big day."

New Moon Preparedness: 3 Days, 3 Ways

Time passes. Even when it seems impossible. Even when each tick of the second hand aches like the pulse of blood behind a bruise. It passes unevenly, in strange lurches and dragging lulls, but pass it does. Even for me.


Indeed!


Premiere weekend is upon us! And if you are smart, and not lucky enough to have the stamina of a vampire, you have already decided to take the day off on Friday after being up all night long with Edward. It just makes good sense. That means you have a three day New Moon weekend, and what could make more sense than to prepare for every contingency. Your friends at Team Dear show you how.* We have co-opted the public service motivational campaign urging you to prepare for New Moon emergencies and disasters for a minimum of 3 days.

Step 1 - Make a Plan!

How will your group meet up and stick together? It is important to plan in advance: how you will contact one another; how you will get back together; and what you will do in different situations. You will want to identify a group leader, or co-leaders. Be sure every member of your group knows how to get in contact with one of the team leaders. You might want to program one of their phone numbers into your cell phone as TDH (Team Deer Hotline).

Depending on your circumstances the first important decision is when will you go? Will you see the movie once during premiere weekend? Twice? Thrice? You may want to visit the theatre in advance to plan your lining-up strategy. Will you buy popcorn and diet coke? Will you share or each get your own? Make sure each member of your group is well informed about all possible contingencies. Drawing a diagram is helpful.Get together well in advance of New Moon Weekend to conduct drills.

Step 2 - Get a Kit!

When preparing for a New Moon emergency situation, it's best to think first about the basics of survival: beverages, snacks, and warmth.

Recommended items:

• Beverages! I'll say no more.
  
• Snacks - at least a 3 day supply.
• Music may be critical to your survival. Check local ordinances; your city may only allow acoustic instruments. Bring small ones, like a ukulele.
  
• And also a coconut.
• First aid kit: smelling salts, extra underwear.
  
• Whistles and/or flares to signal for help.
• A copy of the New Moon book.
  
• Moist towelettes, hand sanitizer. (Have you seen some of the questionable types on Team Edward?)
• Cell phones
• Portable swooning couch.

Our deer Mr. Pattinson is prepared. Are you?

Step 3 - Be Informed!

Knowing what to do during an emergency is an important part of being prepared and may make all the difference when seconds count. Are you prepared?
Because we aren't!


*We reserve the right to withold important strategic information and geographic details so as not to ruin our own enjoyment of New Moon by giving you mad New Mooning skillz to compete with ours. We may withhold details about Edward's penis.

A Drawing From a Fan

You know it's bad when your 11 year old niece is humoring your Twilight obsession.

Thanks, Sophie!

Eclipse Duets: Jacob and Edward BFFs

Now we know what really happened in the tent and why Jacob ranks it as one of the best nights of his life.










New Best Friend, by The Lashes

Jacob: I told you the best things come from tragedy.
Edward: It's hard to think positively when you're down.
Jacob: I saw you in Forks acting dispassionately.
Edward: But I bite everything that I see when you're around.

Jacob: The very thought of you,
Tearing my clothes apart.
Edward: The very thought of you,
I don't know where to start.
BOTH: Do you wanna be best friends?
Do you wanna be my new best friend tonight?
And the rest of our lives.
Tonight and the rest of our lives.

Jacob: I will sit in the non-sucking section for you, boy.
I'll change all of my world, to be at your side.
Edward: And I'll sit at the bar drinking soda pop with you, boy.
I'll change all of my world to go on this ride.

Jacob: The very thought of you,
Tearing my clothes apart.
Edward: The very thought of you,
I don't know where to start.
BOTH: Do you wanna be best friends?
Do you wanna be my new best friend tonight?
And the rest of our lives.
Tonight and the rest of our lives.

Edward: Nothing I can do, boy, to make you feel so high.
Jacob: Nothing I can do, boy, to make your days and nights fly by.
Edward: And all of my clothes smell just like wet dog,
Jacob: Stay with me tonight.

Jacob: The very thought of you,
Tearing my clothes apart.
Edward: The very thought of you,
I don't know where to start.
BOTH: Do you wanna be best friends?
Do you wanna be my new best friend tonight?
And the rest of our lives.
Tonight and the rest of our lives.
Tonight and the rest of our lives.

What does Jacob know about Edward's penis?

Lucky!

What is it about her that makes cute boys want to get topless...


...and make out with her face???


Do you think she knows more than we do about Edward's penis?

Edward Unites Women Everywhere: An Anecdote

Email from Vicky, in Salem, OR:

"Okay, the funniest thing happened this morning. I was in bed with the laptop reading Midnight Sun. The phone rang and it was some gal from Neilson ratings. Just before I hung up with her she asked me the craziest thing. She said she's been reading "those Twilight books" and she wondered if I lived anywhere near where it was filmed or took place. I laughed! I said that most is near Seattle which is a few hours away but part was filmed here in Oregon. Then I mentioned how it was funny she mentioned Twilight as I was just reading Midnight Sun. Which she had not heard of. So I told her about it and how she had to go to the author's website and find it. Had to. She said she was going to and happy she had two days off."

Team Edward

Today I was talking to my friend Matilda, who has seen Twilight, but hasn't read the books (yet). She asked me what the deal was with Team Edward vs Team Jacob, and whether there was really any competition?

Ummm, No.

I suppose the competition between them becomes a pretty important part of the plot, but really, did anyone think Jacob had a chance? 

Still, I don't think I would wear a Team Edward shirt (though I don't know what color it comes in). He can be sort of a D-nozzle.

I would prefer a Team Cullen shirt. I wouldn't mind joining the family. As long as they don't nickname me after any type of monkey.